What I Learned About Fear and Anxiety from Working With Horses

As a lifelong horsewoman, I grew up communicating in the language of horses. That doesn't mean speaking a verbal language but more of an energetic and physical one. Before I knew how powerful this language was to all species, I had to experience its influence firsthand in various situations with various four-legged partners. These equine linguists taught me the power of mindfulness, staying calm while engaging with someone else's fear, and how fear is contagious unless you ground yourself in empathy and kindness.

Run, Kick, or Stomp: How Horses Flight, Fight or Freeze

First, like all animals, horses react to fear with their amygdala, a primitive part of our brains the size of an almond that tells us how to respond with a flight-fight-or-freeze response. However, unlike dogs, cats, or birds, when riding a thousand-pound horse or walking alongside it, their imprinted fear response can be life-threatening to you. Their fear is not only something they experience independently but something you must learn to navigate with them. Something as benign to us as a bucket we have seen countless times could be the spark of a powerful physical reaction to RUN away at top speed, kick or bite, or stand and stomp the ground, breathing like a dragon. I have seen each of these types of responses happen over something as simple as a plastic object.

In a moment of overwhelming reaction, horses like us can't reason or be reasoned with. How you communicate directly affects your ability to work the horse down from the ledge to a level of fear that is only heightened, not all-consuming, and a much safe place to be. How you use your energy to respond in that moment matters more than any verbal cue could. This energy exchange is also true when working with humans experiencing anxiety and fear. If your fear gets triggered, their fear will heighten; if you stay calm and collected, they will realize you aren't afraid, and instinctively, they will come back down to earth. But unlike humans, horses are so much more intuned with us than we are with other humans. Their superpowers are observation and reflection.

Horses Are Mirrors

Horses can't reason how we can, but they are conductors of information and gifted reflectors. They pick up on our slightest shifts in emotions, our elevated heart rates, and a change in our breath before we can self-identify a transformation in ourselves. Horses have the power to mirror. This mirroring is an essential element in their herd dynamics, a communication instinct so engrained in their DNA that it has helped them stay alive and thrive in the wild. Still, like our amygdala response, domesticated horses rarely face life-threatening dangers requiring them to run or fight as they might need in the wild. However, they still respond with the same enthusiasm as a lion chasing them.

The Power of Calm Leadership

So, how can you speak to an anxious horse? By using compassion, creativity, empathy, and mindfulness. Maintaining my presence and being steadfast is critical to down-shift the situation and help the horse down-regulate their programmed fear response. My role is to be the herd leader, dispelling any panic cues. I must be confident, authoritative, respectful, and not forceful or demanding. I must maintain my composure, breath, and manage my fear response to break the engrained cycle in us and other herd animals. Panic breeds panic, and calm breeds calm.

Keep Calm and Carry On

So the next time you comfort someone else in a state of fight-flight-or-freeze, think of them kindly like you would a horse. Comfort them with subtle cues such as breathing deeply, a calming touch such as a hug, or direct them away from their source of anxiety to a safer space. Meet them where they are and soften your energy, be patient with them. Don't try to reason or fix the situation. When in a state of fear, we can't be receptive to thinking; we are only receptive to feelings and emotions. You can be the herd leader by grounding yourself, signaling no need to react. Just as horses, we match each other's energy. Your inner serenity can be a source of comfort without words, logic, or reasoning. An easy phrase to remember is, "Keep calm and carry on." It is a mantra that works well for both horses and humans.

What have animals taught you?

What have you learned from communicating with animals? How have you observed your dog or cat react to fear? How have you helped them through it? What did and didn't work when comforting an anxious friend? I would love to hear your thoughts!